Annoying Things To Do On An Elevator ^^

1) CRACK open your briefcase or handbag, peer Inside and ask "Got enough air in there?"
2) STAND silent and motionless in the corner facing the wall without getting off.
3) WHEN arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act as if you're embarrassed when they open themselves.
4) GREET everyone with a warm handshake and ask him or her to call you Admiral.
5) MEOW occasionally.
6) STARE At another passenger for a while. Then announce in horror: "You're one of THEM" - and back away slowly
7) SAY -DING at each floor.
8) SAY "I wonder what all these do?" And push all the red buttons.
9) MAKE explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
10) STARE, grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce: "I have new socks on."
11) WHEN the elevator is silent, look around and ask: "Is that your beeper?"
12) TRY to make personal calls on the emergency phone.
13) DRAW a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers: "This is my personal space."
14) WHEN there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder, then pretend it wasn't you.
15) PUSH the buttons and pretend they give you a shock. Smile, and go back for more.
16) ASK if you can push the button for other people but push the wrong ones.
17) HOLD the doors open and say you're waiting for your friend. After a while, let the doors close and say "Hi Greg, How's your day been?"
18) DROP a pen and wail until someone reaches to help pick it up, then scream: "That's mine!"
19) BRING a camera and take pictures of everyone in the lift.
20) PRETEND you're a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the Passengers.
21) SWAT at flies that don't exist.
22) CALL out "Group hug" then enforce it.

Imagem do Dia ^^

Miudo Sobredotado ^^

Um professor de Matemática quis pregar uma partida aos seus alunos e disse-lhes:


- Meninos, aqui vai um problema:

Um avião saiu de Amesterdão com uma velocidade de 800 km/h , à pressão de1.004,5
milibares; a humidade relativa era de 66% e a temperatura 20,4 graus C.


A tripulação era composta por 5 pessoas, a capacidade era de 45 assentos para
passageiros, a casa-de-banho estava ocupada e ainda havia mais 5 hospedeiras (mas uma estava de folga).

A pergunta é...
Quantos anos eu tenho?

Os alunos ficam assombrados. O silencio é total.

Então o Joãozinho, lá no fundo da sala e sem levantar a mão, diz prontamente:
- 44 anos, professor!

O professor, muito surpreso, diz:
- Caramba, está certo. Eu tenho 44 anos. Mas como é que tu adivinhaste?

E o Joãozinho:
- Bem, eu deduzi porque tenho um primo que é meio parvo, e ele tem 22
anos...

Multiplicar

Como ser um idiota em 5 liçoes

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